Monday, October 08, 2007

When it all makes sense

May Sarton says, "We travel up to heaven and down to hell a 100 times a day." And if I had to describe the human experience to a non-human entity, that's exactly what I would say.
I'm ending this day with so many things making sense to me. But I definitely didn't start the day that way.
I had an amazing conversation with a cleaning woman who wakes up at 2 am most mornings to chant for peace on the planet. She says that she doesn't have much money or time but when she wakes up at two in the morning to chant for humans across the globe, she feels like she is doing something. I think it's working.
I reminded a child that she could heal herself through her hands. I thought that I was the one doing the reminding but I think she is the one who reminded me.
I had an intense conversation with a french woman who allowed me to examine how far I have come in this life and reactivated that challenging inclination I have to question ALL things.
I had a beautiful friend leave me such beautiful and heart softening words of gratitude on my voicemail that I couldn't keep the tears from coming if I wanted to.
We are all just an experiment here but there are these moments of knowing .... of remembering, of feeling like all is right and having that vision of clarity that nothing can touch.
I know I am a vessel. Nothing I 'own' is mine - not my time, emotions, stuff, energy, love, etc. It is all passing through me. That makes it all so different.
I am here to serve. Serving is this wondrous gem of infinite receiving that gives back so many more times than we can see.
If I am a vessel and I am here to serve, all I can do is allow.
I show up and magic happens. That's the ideal equation.
When that doesn't happen that's called me getting in my own way.
And when I get to end a night feeling this way, I thank Source, the Creator and all of Existence for allowing me this gift of traveling up to heaven and down to hell in such a way that I can never trade anything for the experience of this day.
Thank you.