A Day of Defeat

Sometimes it happens: everything goes wrong ... on every level of the day. Things happen at work, in the personal realm, out in the world in general.
I know irony is one of the Universe's ways of expressing itself because it peeks at me often. My irony at the moment- wanting so badly for so long to live alone, be completely independent, and not have to rely on anyone for anything so I can do what I want when I want. What comes along with that? Aloneness. At the end of a day of defeat, I am left with myself ... to pick me up, hold me, and remind me that All Things are temporary and everything will be okay. It seems that a strength and will to do that was cultivatedinside of me long before I was on my own but now is the time I see myself using it the most.

Forgetting and remembering is such a natural cycle of life. As natural as the dying plant that wilts into the ground, only to become part of the soil so as to return back into the world of living as a newer and more vibrant form.

I have forgotten that dance can cure anything. I have forgotten that I have soooo many people I can call on for anything I might need at any given moment. I have forgotten that all it takes to shift my state of mind is to become present in any moment and notice what is there. I have forgotten how wonderful tears can feel wandering down my face and pooling into the caves of my ears. I have forgotten that I can have, be, do anything that I want. I have forgotten how wonderful and amazing I am.

Yesterday I lay my head down in a mess of tears and defeat, knowing that I would wake up today in a new way. And I have.

Yesterday was a day of defeat.

Today is A Day of Success ... whatever I choose to make that look like.